
This is the next in my found poetry series, which I've been doing since the new year. I've taken it from one of my manuscripts, featuring Jocelyne, Lady Moncrieffe, the Dowager Countess of Kinnoull. It's the early 1820's near Crieff, Scotland.
Guthrie Carmichael is a Highland Scot working on her lowland estate as the gamekeeper. His decision to stop poaching from her estate requires one last delivery of game in town.
I've based Lady Moncrieffe on Canadian actress Neve Campbell. Guthrie is based on English actor Sean Bean.
You can read a previous poem about Jocelyne HERE.
You can Ride the Poetry Train by clicking HERE.
As Prisons Go
I arranged to be taken into Crieff
Meet up with my sister coming in by coach
First time in four years. Four years!
Disheartening thing - if not for Finlay’s death
Would this visit even take place?
The MacDougal resentments
Only stretched so far, thank Heaven
Whom did I see seated across the square
But the gamekeeper, Carmichael
Soldier stopped before him
Gaze traveled up to the red jacket
Before he had a chance to blink
One of those booted feet kicked
The pipe from Carmichael’s mouth
Scarred hand reached down
Took up the sacks. Carmichael
Kept his gaze trained on the soldier
“What would this be? Eh?
You wouldn’t be the lord of these parts, now?”
Carmichael neither moved nor spoke
Soldier lifted grouse from sack
Dropped the rest into the dust
Dangled bird from taloned feet
Too close to Carmichael’s face
“Name!” the soldier barked
Black boot planted on Carmichael’s hand
“Stop! Stop, I beg you! What is going on here?
Let him be!” Pulled at red-jacketed arm
Sergeant shook me off angrily
Until he saw who it was
Guthrie snatched hand to chest
Soldier saluted sharply
“This man is poaching from the estate.
I’ve apprehended him for you.”
I recalled these very sacks
Fixed to the back of the gamekeeper's saddle
That morning after the storm
That morning when he'd found me
Wet, bedraggled, desperate
Had seen me safely home
I'd sleepwalked but
He'd found me
Found me with these sacks
Fixed to the back of his saddle
Carmichael hung his head
Cradled his hand
I stared at his crumpled hat
Lying in the dust
“You have made a rather unfortunate error, Sergeant.
This man is my gamekeeper.”
Carmichael looked up
Soldier’s bravado paled
“Can you stand, Mr. Carmichael?”
I extended my hand to him
“Don’t be too concerned, Milady.”
Carmichael's voice so ragged
“Where is your regiment stationed
Sergeant?" I asked
"I should like to have a word
With your commanding officer.”
Soldier colored till his face
Was indistinguishable from
Scarlet fullcloth of jacket
Bead of sweat trickled its way
From under black-plumed bonnet
Down his rough-skinned jawline
It vanished in the gap between
Neck and stiff white collar choking throat
“May I speak to you privately, Ma’am?”
“By all means, Sergeant.”
We stepped aside, walked a few paces
Along the wall. Stopped
Bent our heads together
In rapt discussion for some minutes
Soldier broke away abruptly
As though he’d been stung
He saluted, then moped from the square
I turned toward the carriage
Carmichael helped me up the step
My sister waiting for me
Carmichael withdrew his hand
Cradling his sore one
“You had better get in,” I said
“You have been injured, after all.”
He nodded toward his horse
Waiting patiently across the square
“Then be quick about your business.
Make a point of stopping at the castle
When you return."
He opened and closed his mouth
Like a fish in the grass
He nodded his assent. His hand
Moved up to tug at hat that wasn’t there
His fingers hung suspended in midair
For an awkward moment
Then ran through his hair
“Drive on, Willis,” I called out
Old man clucked to the horses
Carriage lurched forward
Carmichael stepped out of the way
Before wheels ran over his toes
I stood, my back to him
In the pale green drawing room
“Thank you for coming,” I said
“Your servant, Ma’am,” he answered
Bowing slightly
“Are you?”
“I am.”
I broke from where I stood
Moving slowly round the edges of the room
“I would question your definition
Of ‘servant’, Mr. Carmichael.
You have been using my late husband
And me to suit your own purposes.”
“Ma’am?” he croaked
I halted, turned and faced him
“If you were poaching that morning
After the storm...why
Did you come to my aid?”
Carmichael spluttered
As if he’d swallowed a
Gulp of water down the wrong pipe
“I couldn't very well leave you out there!”
“Another man might have done just that.
Well, we are in a fine pickle, are we not?”
“Aye, Milady. We are, that.”
“You should be turned over to
The magistrate, and have done with you."
He returned my gaze, giving himself over to me.
I shuddered
“Why did ye tell that lie for me?”
He asked
“Laird Moncrieffe - he would have
Had me in gaol by now, sure.”
“Perhaps. The man who fancies himself
The new lord of Kinnoull
Would be even more severe than that.
Think hard, now, and consider carefully
What I am going to offer you.
I once offered you a room here
To recuperate from your wounds
But you refused. I’m afraid I must
Make that offer again
And I beg you to accept this time.
I have need of your cottage.
As prisons go, I hope you’ll find
This one to be exceptional.
I, myself, have always considered this
To be a home.
Mr. Carmichael, I possess information
You would prefer me not to pass along.
You likewise hold secrets of mine.
‘Men do not despise a thief
If he steals to satisfy his soul
When he is hungry.'"
He looked as if he'd just
Dashed the contents of an upset stomach
Extending my right hand, I said
“I believe we must shake on it.”
Carmichael rallied
Taking my hand in his
After one shake for form’s sake
We let go with expediency
“I’ll ring for Kearney,” I said
Picking up the bell to shake it furiously
- Julia Smith, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Poetry Train Monday - 97 - As Prisons Go
Posted by Julia Phillips Smith at 3:38 PM
Labels: As Prisons Go, Found poetry, Guthrie Carmichael, Jocelyne, Neve Campbell, Poetry Train, Sean Bean
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Poetry Train Monday - 96 - Not After That Look

Happy Easter to all who celebrate this springtime holiday.
Continuing with my found poetry series, here's a poem I've taken from my very first attempt at writing a novel. It's my only completed manuscript to date, and it needs a lot of reworking. But as with many writers, since this is the first novel-length character to inhabit my thoughts and my heart, this character will always be the most special to me.
Guthrie is a Highland Scot in the early 1820's, working on a lowland estate as the gamekeeper. The lady he serves is a newly-widowed countess, whom he recently helped return to the castle when he discovered her out on the grounds in only her sodden nightdress after a storm.
A terrible miscalculation has convinced Guthrie he must stop poaching from the estate, as he's been doing to save money for a new life in the Canadas. Guthrie informs his best friend and poaching partner that he won't be taking part in it anymore.
Click HERE for a previous poem about Guthrie.
I've based him on English actor Sean Bean. Lady Moncrieffe is based on Canadian actress Neve Campbell.
You can Ride the Poetry Train by clicking HERE.
Not After That Look
Guthrie left Lundy’s room
Above the storehouse
Headed back over fields
To his own rough cottage
No one about at this late hour
Just as well be noon
All the sleep he was likely to get
Worked up as he was
Paused in the night air
Head back, look at the stars
What he needed was a smoke
Boulder ahead a little ways
Sit himself down, light up his pipe
Collect himself
Smoke rising gracefully into the night
Nice to sit here
Only man awake in all of Scotland
Just God and Guthrie Carmichael
Sitting together and having a smoke
Thoughts like bait in a swollen stream
Sooner or later, these thoughts
Would arrange themselves
An actual plea
For forgiveness
Movement in the distance
Turned slightly
Peered into the gloom
Unholy shiver pure fright
Ran through him head to foot
Liquid movement, gliding paleness
Took pipe from mouth
Slid off the rock
Quiet as the ghostie there
A spirit loose in these parts?
Could well be a brand new ghost
He might be scared witless
If he was the first to see it
Wouldn’t that be something?
Crept along, gained steadily
Could make out a dress, a white dress
He raced ahead
More noise with increased speed
Skin along his neck crawling
Dare not steal a look behind him
Might lose footing in the dark
It would be upon him
In all its ghastly menace
Leaped down a small rise
Close to turf, eyes level to ground
Perhaps he would give this ghostie its name
Figure’s approach inexorable
Guthrie’s winded breathing quieted
Its face
He had to be imagining
It couldn’t be
The ghost was his mistress
Lady Moncrieffe
Had the lady died in the night?
Remorse for the injury he gave her
Flared hotly in his chest
Impossible
She had mended from that wound
An accident?
He followed again, wondering
Heaviness of her movements
Manner fluid, dreamlike
Dreamlike
Guthrie stopped cold
That morning he’d followed her on horseback
The morning after the storm
No one had spoken of it
As if it hadn’t taken place at all
Eventually this path would take her
To the road where they’d first met up
She was sleepwalking. Had to be.
Increased his pace a little
Didn’t take long to catch up with her
Stomach lurched again
Her eyes were wide open
She took several trancelike steps
She slowed and stopped
“Ma’am.” Guthrie touched the edge of his tam
She crossed her arms in front of her
“I don’t think he’ll be coming, after all.”
And she turned to walk back along the path
Guthrie dashed smartly to overtake her
Slowed to a walk
She looked at him
Her gaze traveling through him
Smile flittered across her lips
Eased next to Guthrie
Slipped her hand between his arm and waistcoat
He crooked his elbow
Arm and arm with Lady Moncrieffe
Nearly dragging him along with single-mindedness
The long walk to Kinnoull an unsettling stroll
Her bosom pressed against his elbow
Her hip brushing his thigh
Was she awake or asleep?
How could he be so fortunate among men
Coming across her each time
She took these strange odysseys?
Perhaps this worked as a penance
For not putting an end to his poaching
Sooner
If the Good Lord meant to show him
What it meant to be a shepherd
Who was Guthrie Carmichael to argue?
He would see his wayward lamb home
No harm done
No one the wiser again if they were lucky
Outline of castle loomed
In faint light of approaching dawn
No word had passed between them
They reached a door he'd never seen before
Could see that it gaped there, still open
Why the turmoil swirling in his stomach?
He led her to the doorway
Opened it a little wider
And passed her through
Extending the arm she’d been clutching
Till she was over the threshhold
He watched her feet
Assuring that she didn’t trip
Then he looked up into her face
Before he knew whether he was up
Down or turned on his ear
There she was - planting her lips on his
Lady Moncrieffe stepped back
Eyes trained on him
In the most unnerving manner
Shining with languorous flame
Before he had a chance to stammer anything coherent
The corners of her lips curled
A provocative smile
“I’ll wait for you,” she purred
Beginning to walk inside
She turned her head to glance at him
Lips closing over invitations unspoken
Lashes dropped to hide desire in her eyes
Then she was gone, swallowed into the shadows
Guthrie stood there for a long while
Unable to move out of the doorway
The words she’d spoken
Commanded him against any will of his own
Like a man from the old tales, her spell cast on him
And nothing he could do to resist her
Come now, lad. She’s dreaming.
That invitation was not meant for her gamekeeper
For whom, then?
Her poor husband, that’s who.
He reached into the darkness of Kinnoull
His fingers groped for the doorhandle
As if reaching into a hive
Crawling with bees
Carefully, he pulled the door shut
He would post himself on watch not too far away
Keep his eye out
In case she wandered again
He’d light up his pipe, finish his smoke
There’d be no sleep
Not for him
Not after that look
Into his ladyship’s eyes
- Julia Smith, 2009
Posted by Julia Phillips Smith at 11:53 AM
Labels: Found poetry, Guthrie Carmichael, Neve Campbell, Not After That Look, Poetry Train, Sean Bean
Monday, February 18, 2008
Poetry Train Monday - 37 - Gold That Burns
At the request of Susan, here is a bit of backstory for Guthrie Carmichael, the Scottish gamekeeper from my excerpt posted last week.
Gold That Burns
At my birth, my father bid his love goodbye
She slipped away, my sister clutching to her breast
Five boys - poor Jean a wee thing and all
No girls to wash and peel and mend
Five boys too young to work. Too young
To stop the men with fists who took him off
I pulled upon her hand yet on we trudged
She knew our father's cough would never heal
The damp, the rot, the gaol's stone walls
Took on the spectre of his hollowed gaze
My sister raised us all with his firm hand
With mother's gentle kiss, and so we thrived
While Jean seemed yet a girl, so slight, so worn
No suitor, only brothers grown and safe, in service all
Though it would hurt her to the quick to know
Her dearest Guthrie poached from the estate
Putting guineas by to sail from these cruel shores
Determined that I be the man my father dare not dream
Risking stone gaol and iron door with every snare
Am I seeking life and fortune with my plan?
Or do I run from father's dying grasp, gaining no ground
Seeing only Jean's trusting gaze each time I
Lift the false shelf to hide the gold that burns
Copyright - Julia Smith - 2008
Posted by Julia Phillips Smith at 5:56 PM
Labels: Guthrie Carmichael, Poem, Poetry Train, Sean Bean, Susan Helene Gottfried
